Saturday, February 5, 2011

OBSESSED: Haters & Stalkers...





I did not mention any intention to violate my privacy on the part of Google.  My concern is not about the fact that I write a public blog and there is no restriction on who may visit and read it.  My concern is that tools I have in place to learn about my visitors has been bypassed by the "follow privately" option and Google reader.

I learned about my stalker because she admitted to how she was reading my blog in such a way that I would not know she was able to read my blog.  I use Sitemeter and Stattracker both as tools to keep track of visitors to my blog.  If I have followers who are following publicly, I assume they are reading my blog as well.  I could "block" any of those who follow publicly if I so choose.  In this case, Google does not allow me any option to disallow anonymous followers.  Nor can I "block" an anonymous reader because I do not know about their existence.  As for "knowing" anyone else, I see some statistics through sitemeter and stattracker.

I have been blogging for four years now.  I have worked in or closely with IT fields for more than 10 years.  I understand the concept that my blog is posted publicly.  What I did not expect, was that tools I could use to track visitors so that I could work on my own to maintain my anonymity could be rendered useless.  What I did not expect, was a loophole that could allow someone to read my blog without me ever having any knowledge about it.  This means people who want to be a blog writer, but have someone in their life who would use anything against them to hurt them, do not have any tools with which to protect themselves unless they want to have a private blog, and going private means a blog owner forgoes opportunities to attract new readers.  Sometimes this is not an acceptable trade off.

So my question, and what I really want to know, and what I really want to get to Google, is why is it not possible to close this loophole through which people can read blogs without being tracked in any way at all by the blog owner?  There are great tools to track visitors to the blog itself.  The public followers are tracked because they have let the owner know they are "following".  Why is it possible for anyone to be able to follow a blog and the owner never knows about it?  This does not have to be an option provided by Google, and I think it has more potential for harm than help.


-Posted by Blogger Steel Horseman (I feel you brother)



OBSESSED
(To disable music to enjoy MC scrowl to the bottom of page and press pause)




" I was like, Why are you so obsessed with me?" -MC

Recently I have come across the topic of haters and stalkers.  One thing that I do not understand is when someone has moved on from a relationship with it being clear they do not want anything to do with the person. Why do some resort to harassing? What is wrong with these people. Why do they contact your family? Why do they interfere with your work? Why? I know it is a sign of being deeply sick and plain out psychotic. What is worse and sad is if the person is  much older with children that deserves all of their attention. Why keep trying to communicate with someone who does not want to communicate? I feel when a person has become this desperate they become dangerous. Haters and Stalkers need to realize that people have the right to move on with their lives. The person that you are stalking does not have to respond to you, engage you or even be nasty to you. That person has the right to be silent. Your persistence in terrorizing confirms that it was smart and necessary for the person to severe ALL ties. Especially if the person is walking away with no intentions of wanting to hurt, hate or cause the hater/stalker any type of pain. The person simple wants to be left alone and unharmed. For all those people out there being stalked.. My prayers go out to you.


To the haters/stalkers please leave your object of desire alone. It is not becoming of you. You do look like a fool and frankly crazy. You are scaring people. It will be embarrassing to end up in jail over stalking someone who does not want to have anything to do with you. According to the law the stalked need an X amount of proof or damage before the hater/stalker can be served. Sometimes the hater/stalker would want to call on God or the law themselves because when you contact family or friends of your object, you may find an undesirable reaction from the family or friends. Back to the law: The law is great in certain states because all you have to do is collect all the emails, they trace URLs(goody!), the proof of contact with family (particularly the young ones), emails to addresses that were never forwarded to them or given to them hence it being illegal to posses. I did my research and this handsome police officer gave me the rundown and swore protection for me or anyone who has hater/stalkers on their backs. I warn all you hater/stalkers out there to pray. Dont feel defeated or angry. Hater/stalkers you brought this on yourself. Stop before it gets to a place where you are the criminal publicly, losing everything. It is not worth it. Use the stalking time to work on yourselves improving your mental health and to contribute to the growth of your family.

Dont see it as a failure that you can't have the last word. Change your perspective, learning from the relationship and take full responsibility for why it may not have worked.. Maybe due to your psychotic behavior. I am sure the harassed have taken full responsibility of their transgressions thus making the decision to move on without contact. Take this as proof that you have issues that goes to the extent to make people feel scared and uncomfortable. This is not honorable and you would not want someone to do this to your mother, sisters or children. Have dignity and move on. Life is great and often short. Dont waste your time on wasting time.
<BLESSED>


C'Mon Man Stop Being Crazy Its Scary!!!!
Cartoon courtesy of great artist Chad Baldwin







HELP for the stalked: ADVICE FROM ANNY JACOBY. 
(*Which I have taken very  seriously*)


STALKING IS A CRIME!
Once you’ve been a victim, you know how life-destroying stalking can be.
What Can You Do If You Are Bein g Stalked?
There are no easy answers to this question. First and foremost, you should always think about yoursafety. Here are some other things to consider:
  • Report the stalking to your local law enforcement agency. While officers may not have enough evidence to arrest the stalker, it is important to develop this “official” record of the stalking behavior. If a law enforcement report is made, the information may become public.
  • Some stalkers believe there are hidden messages within conversations they have with their victims that encourage them to continue the stalking. Some experts suggest that if your stalker is a former intimate partner or someone who believes you want to be in a relationship, you must be clear and firm early on about wanting to end the relationship. The longer the relationship goes on, the harder it is for the stalker to get the message that you are not interested.
  • If the stalking has continued for a long time, some believe it is best for the victim to cease all communication with the stalker. Instead, let the “system” communicate with him through a law enforcement officer, probation officer, or through a protection order.
  • A protection from stalking order may or may not be effective in ending the stalking. These orders may be most effective if issued when the stalking behavior first begins. They also appear to be most effective in communities where violations of the order are taken very seriously by law enforcement, prosecutors, and judges. If these situations do not apply to you, you may want to consider whether a protection order will help or hurt your situation. Call your local domestic violence/sexual assault programs in your state/county for further information and for a brochure explaining how to get a protection from stalking order.
  • In some situations, further contact between the victim and the stalker, tends to encourage the stalker. Therefore, if you can, try to avoid the following:
    - mediation
    - joint therapy
    - shared custody
    - face-to-face child exchanges
    - protection orders (which will require a face-to-face hearing)
  • Keep a log of all stalking behaviors, including the following (see Incident Log below):
    - date of incident
    - times and places the incidents occurred
    - description of stalking behavior
    - witnesses to the incident
  • If you believe you may be in imminent danger, develop a safety plan, taking into consideration the following:
    - critical phone numbers, such as law enforcement, friends, domestic violence or sexual assault programs
    - critical phone numbers and contact information for other important people or services you may need after reaching a safe location, such as neighbors, attorneys, prosecutors, medical care, child care, or pet care
    - keep a reserve of necessities in case you have to leave your home quickly, such as a suitcase in the trunk of your car or at a friend’s house; include money, medication, toys or items important to the children
    - consider having important documents such as passports, immigration documents, birth certificates, and social security numbers readily accessible
    - alert people who may be part of your safety plan, such as law enforcement, employers, family, friends, neighbors, or security personnel
  • Consider whether any of the following measures would help decrease or prevent some of the dangers connected to stalking:
    - installing solid core doors with dead bolts
    - changing locks, securing all spare keys
    - installing outside lighting
    - trimming bushes and vegetation around your residence
    - identifying locations that may be safe for you, such as police stations, residences of family/friends, local churches, or other public places
    - getting an unlisted number or, if you have financial means, using a “dummy” answering machine connected to your published phone line. The private or unlisted number can be reserved for close friends or family and the stalker may not realize you have another line
    - varying travel routes and other routines
    - limiting time walking or jogging alone
    - informing a trusted neighbor about the situation and, if possible, giving them a description or a photo of the stalker, asking them to call law enforcement if they see anything unusual
  • Sexual assault and domestic violence programs may be able to provide you with additional help and information. The Stalking Resource Center can also provide you with information on stalking.
If you are in danger, call 911.







Anny is a Survivor of Domestic Violence with many years as a Certified Advocate. She firmly believes that EVERY female has the absolute right to protect and defend herself mentality, emotionally, spiritually and ultimately physically.
Anny received her PDR (Personal Defense Readiness) Instructor Certification in 2008.
www.annyjacoby.com
www.realisticfemaleselfdefense.com
www.projectsafegirls.com
anny@annyjacoby.com

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